|| The Feminine Mystique [ o p e n ! ]

[ellie [ex-everything]]

It's been a while since the last time she decided to take a journey.
A penny for your thoughts, an adventure to find yourself -- wasn't that how it always went? And yet, for some reason, she cannot help but consider that it had proven to be the inverse of that. How reckless was she, leaving the nest before she was properly ready; risking what she had for something that wasn't yet necessary.
She is careful not to live with regrets -- and so she has none on that front -- but at the same time, that does not mean that you have to be reckless. The past is full of experiences, and while it is not wise to dwell on mistakes that may or may not have been made, it would be foolhardy to simply ignore the fact that, well.
Mistakes had been made.

Too late she had realized this.
But, then again, she wasn't going to start beating herself up about it.
It was time to live in the present. For all accounts and purposes.

And, presently, she has regained her desire to travel. In a manner of speaking.

Porrim carefully zips up her backpack, pulling at it a little more roughly than she intended to near the middle, but making sure it was safe all the same. It would, if past accounts were any indication at all, have to last her a long time, and during the most testing of circumstances.
Then again, in some way, she had faced it all. Tramping around Kanto with nothing more than a pokemon and a backpack to her name was not exactly a new concept to her.
The only difference was that this time, maybe she would have others she could meet up with.
Oh, and maybe she'd catch a pokemon or two. But she wouldn't get her hopes up on that one.

She doesn't quite know why she has gained this urge once more, and it bothers her in some way. This was no act of petty rebellion, no showing of anything, no desire to find herself (because she knew that much already -- or did she? she was almost certain that she did) or anything of the sort.
Was she bored? Perhaps. There is no denying that there is a gnawing feeling to it though -- but is that the right word? No. Anxiety. A sense of urgency.
There was something that she was meant to be doing, and yet she did not feel comfortable with it. It was her duty, in a sense, and at one point she would screamed and howled for it. But this, but this.
This was a much more passive resentment -- because in a way she supposed she was still the same -- she knows that she must, she knows that this was just stalling and that it was, in every way, futile. Worthless.

But she is stalling and she wants to continue it, for a few more sweeps, anyway. Just until she finds the drive to go back, just until she bores of this and, in her own flighty manner, flees to the allure of the new.
Even if the new is the incredibly appealing prospect of living underground, never to see the light of day once more.

For some reason, she doubts that she'll ever want to constrain herself in such a way.
Only fuck that -- it's not just for some reason, it's for every reason imaginable and the injustice of it all and how trapped she feels and how, and how, and how.

She swings the backpack around her shoulder suddenly, shaking her head and scowling a little as she walks out the door.
No. She was not going to dwell on any of that. She was making the decision to leave, to train, to do something with her life (or what was left of it-- oh would you stop) and find something to do and whatever else.
And maybe get rid of some stereotypes as she went.

One could only dream.

As she walks, though, she realizes that the backpack feels much too light, and a certain dread creeps over her as she realizes that she almost walked into the wilderness completely unprepared.
Better wise up, Pomary. Didn't want to get too hasty and lose everything, now.

She smiles to herself, trying to lighten up as she makes her way to the general store.
Just one last stop before she's on her way -- for good or for now, for better or for worse.
(Isn't that a something, though? Some kind of title -- she's not entirely sure.)

Provisions, though, she thinks as she looks up and down the shelves. That's all she's looking for -- things for her base survival.
It didn't pay to go out into the new (even if it was very old) unprepared, in any case.

[/size]

[OLDROXY]

Roxy couldn’t help wondering if coming straight to Saffron had been the best idea. The city was everything she’d always dreamed of, sure. The skyscrapers! The shops! The hustle-bustle! Roxy was all over this Big City business.
But a part of her was feeling a little overwhelmed by it all and, if she was honest, a little scared?

It was a huge, huuuuuuge city, and she’d even talked to a few people! But she still felt just a little bit -unbearably- alone.
Janey said she’d meet her here. Where was she? Why were they not having super best friend girltalk right now? Ugh, she should’ve stayed on the routes a little longer, maybe caught some stuff. She was just in such a fucking rush to see everyone! She felt a little ridiculous now, actually. Hermione needed training, she needed to show her friends how competent and frankly brilliant she was.

Oh, shit. There was that contest to worry about, too! She’d said some pretty boldass shit about how she and Hermione were gonna kick all kinda of ass, but she wasn’t actually one hundred per cent sure how this ass kicking was going to happen. She ought to look for shops, somewhere to buy outfits or something. Maybe a wizard hat???? You could not go wrong with a wizard hat.
She hoped.
Okay, a part of her was sort of expecting the contest to be a total disaster. She’d have to get drunk as fuck to manage it without dying of stage fright.

Speaking of which, she could use a goddamn drink right now.
Who cared if it was morning? Sobriety sucked ass. Maybe she’d be able to pick something up from one of the stores? Though all the stores on this row looked like they were for fuckin’ Pokémon. Never mind their needs, when was a place gonna cater to her very real need for alcohol?

Ah well, couldn’t be helped, shed guessed, pushing her way into a random shop in an effort to actually do something. Maybe this place sold Skitty catnip? That’d be cute as fuck. Then maybe she and Hermione could both head into that contest totally shitfaced.
What a plan.

Looking around though, all Roxy was seeing was a bunch of useless shit she didn’t need. Like Pokeballs? Greatballs? Who needed that crap when you had Loveballs, aka the best ball. so romantic. Plus they were pink and matched her outfit, which was great. You had to think about style when you were adventuring.
But okay, she guessed buying a potion or two might be a good idea.
It would have been more sensible for her to buy a whole bunch of regular potions, but she picked up two hyper potions instead, so as not to spoil the lovely theme the contents of her bag had going on.

Then a figure caught her sight.
Damn, this troll looked scary. Tattoos, piercings: the works.
Roxy was sort of dazzled by her, and if she were a little more inebriated, she’d probably approach her more boldly.

“Yo, gurl! Lovin’ the tats. You a trainer too?”
Wow, not the most exciting or graceful conversation starter. She was so fucking boring when she was sober. Was having another conversation with a complete stranger even what Roxy wanted to do?
Well, it was better than sitting around looking at shit you didn’t want to buy. Maybe she’d make a friend.